The conversation went like this: “Honey, your mom called while you were driving home. She didn’t want to tell you this on the cell phone while you were driving. Your folks were into the Doctor today. After lots of testing he told them his diagnosis. Your dad has Alzheimer’s Disease (AD). He is lucky he was in early and got a diagnosis early. He has time left before he loses his mind. The Doctor said he has four to eight good years, but within twenty it will takes his body, then his mind, then his life!”
A cold chill slammed through the room as Mavis gave Bob this news. “Oh my God” Bob exclaimed. “He told me he just about had his retirement saved up and could retire in a few years. He was looking forward to traveling, fishing, spending time with all of us, time he didn’t have building his career, raising and educating all of us, paying the mortgage and saving up to retire. Just a few more years, then to lay back!”
“Your mom said he is going to have to tell the boss. The boss has been bugging him about not getting his work done. That’s why he went to see a doctor in the first place! If he tells they both expect the boss will terminate him. That isn’t half so bad, but do you know what. The company he gave all of his life to dropped their disability coverage as one of the cut backs on the benefits package for all the employees. They also reduced the amount of premium they pay on health care coverage, increased all of the co-pays and put on a huge deductible at the start for all services. Oh, and they cut out the family coverage they provided.
They said they had to keep the company operating in this country and keep all the employees in jobs. They could go off shore, you know India
“The next thing your folks are worried about is the company cutting back on the pension fund they provided. They are talking about it being under funded and may go bankrupt sooner than latter unless everyone agrees to cut back on what they have coming.
If all that isn’t enough now it’s the AD thing they have to deal with. Your mom can’t keep working and take care of your dad. Her boss has been asking for more hours as it is. This was to have been a part time job. Now as a contract employee they can do anything the want with her. Oh Bob, what will they ever do?”
The doctor’s office if it is like most does a nice job at treating, diagnosing and medicating disease. About how to deal with it they don’t have a clue and don’t try to. It is not within their job description. “Take this and come back in 6 months, or a year, depending on the doc.
If you are diagnosed with Alcoholism the doc knows and you probably do to, go to treatment or go right into AA. The doc can’t fix it, he knows that, but he also knows what you should do and will recommend it.
Alcoholism is a family disease. It is not cured, it does not go away, but treatment and AA are all geared to teaching how to cope with it, how to accept it, and live around it, not giving into it. It works and is proven time and again.
Although AD compares in many ways with Alcoholism in its sense of an incurable family disease, dealing with it does not have its own AA. The doc initiates no direction; the patient and family are simply left out in the cold. Some times a knowledgeable social worker can be of some help, rarer times a call to your local Alzheimer’s Association gives some direction depending on how organized and equipped they are to offer help.
Most groups are busy with programs to raise funds to find a cure, a very noble and needed task. One however that offers no immediate help if you are unlucky to have picked up the bug before it is curable.
There are ways to help while you still can be helped and places to take you once that period has passed you by. Palliative care is available at Nursing Homes, and to a degree in Assisted Living Complexes and Day Care Services. These can be programs occupying the attention of the patient or simply soporific drugs to mollify consciousness.
In the early stages of AD there is so much that can be done so little that is being done. Keeping the patient engaged, stimulated cognitively and creatively, socialized, in to exercise and eating right along with their medication. This can do so much.
It makes the time in wait for the next shoe to drop in the brain such as to not notice the dire events that will ultimately transpire. The converse is the patient hopelessly sitting and waiting to go to the Home, otherwise alone, shunned by society; this does no more than grease the slippery slope leading to physical and mental oblivion.
If steps are taken to fill the time of folks in early stage their time there can be prolonged. They can stay at home longer. They will not need home care as quickly. They will have a quality of life that makes the effort to retain that so much to their liking. This can make their lot said by many, “There is life after AD!”
The premium of this package is the savings of expense. The longer you stay out of need of Home Care, Day Care, Assisted Living and/or Nursing Home Care the less Cost of Care is incurred saving of family, community and country.
Bob and Bob’s mom can look everywhere but will unfortunately find a dearth of available programs or people to help. They will find themselves like too many others like them on their own, making up their coping skills as they go along.
The next question they ask is How d’ya pay for it.
Stay tuned, this story line continues
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